


Make The Yuletide Gay

by orphan_account



Category: SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon), The SpongeBob Musical - Various/Anthony & Coulton/Jarrow
Genre: Awkwardness, Christmas Party, Coming Out, First Kiss, M/M, The Krusty Krab
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-25 06:20:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21911371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: At the Krusty Krab Christmas Party, Squidward makes it known how he feels about SpongeBob.
Relationships: SpongeBob SquarePants/Squidward Tentacles
Comments: 7
Kudos: 84





	Make The Yuletide Gay

“Come back soon.”

Those three words, spoken jokingly but with a hint of melancholy, stopped Squidward in his tracks. He frowned, looked at the table loaded with snacks and a punch bowl, and looked back at SpongeBob. His eyebrows rose and he took a deep breath in and out.

“Ha.” SpongeBob laughed bitterly and without humor. His eyes widened and he scoffed before turning his attention to the mug of decaf coffee he held in his hands.

Squidward ground his teeth together so hard that his jaw began to hurt. What exactly was he supposed to say or do in this situation? He didn’t even know what SpongeBob meant. Did he mean hurry up and come back with his food? Did he expect him to bring him food, too?

Whatever he had meant, he clearly expected an answer of some sort.

“Yeah, sure thing. Do you...want something to eat?” He scratched his shoulder in nervous agitation. The sweater he was wearing had been a gift from SpongeBob. This one, at least, had been knitted from wool instead of eyelashes, but it was still incredibly itchy. Squidward was only wearing it to humor SpongeBob for the Christmas party. In fact, he had only come to the party as a favor to SpongeBob in the first place.

Mr. Krabs had reluctantly closed The Krusty Krab at 7:00 PM. Even though he’d once taken pity on SpongeBob and dressed as the mythical Santa Claus to give presents to the people in town years before, and even though he celebrated it in his way every year, Squidward couldn’t tell you what exactly they were supposed to be celebrating.

The idea of a fat stranger breaking into his house in the middle of the night gave him the creeps, whether he left presents behind or not. He’d said as much to SpongeBob one year, and was met with the pathological optimist’s childlike grin and requisite flick of his nose. He never would have told him, but by then Squidward had actually started to enjoy it.

It had been just a couple of nights ago that SpongeBob had more or less convinced Squidward to keep going, even though at the ripe old age of 40-something he felt that his life was over. He couldn’t quite put it into words - none he would every say out loud - but SpongeBob had basically become his _raison d’être_.

Squidward’s stomach growled. He surveyed the offerings and decided to fill half a plate with things he liked, and half with what he knew SpongeBob liked. He got a pimento cheese sandwich cut into a triangular shape for himself, and a handful of grapes with several cubes of cheese on toothpicks for SpongeBob. He got a cup of punch and headed back toward SpongeBob, who was having an animated conversation with Sandy.

Squidward felt a sudden rush of envy and hurried over. “Here you go,” he said as he handed SpongeBob the plate. “I didn’t know how hungry you were, so I just got some cheese and grapes. If you’re still hungry later, I’ll get you some more. I guess you can have the sandwich, too. Oh, and here’s some punch.” He took the mug out of his hands and drank the few sips of coffee that were left and set the empty mug on the table.

 _Keep it cool, Squidward._ He chuckled nervously and rubbed the back of his neck as SpongeBob took the plate and Dixie cup of punch. “Thanks, Squidward.” He took a sip of the punch and popped a grape in his mouth. “Mmm-mm.” He picked up the sandwich and took a bite. It was a small bite, but given that the sandwich had been tiny to begin with, it made up nearly half of the whole sandwich.

Sandy’s cheeks turned red and her eyes bulged as she struggled to contain her laughter. She held her sides and shook in an exaggerated effort to stifle it. Squidward scowled and took the plate from SpongeBob. He ate the other half of the sandwich and a few cubes of cheese and handed it back over.  


“Thanks, _**friend**_.” He didn’t know why he stressed the word. So what if Sandy Cheeks was the smartest creature in Bikini Bottom, besides himself? Why did he feel the need to act differently around her?

“Oh yeah, SpongeBob just got through telling me all about what a special ‘friend’ he is to you. Ain’t that right, SpongeBob?” She grinned and roughly elbowed SpongeBob’s side. “Ow!” he yelped and dropped the small plastic Dixie cup which was fortunately empty. It clattered as it hit the floor and rolled away.

Squidward guffawed and slung an arm around SpongeBob’s shoulder. He caressed the bruised skin of his ribs gently through the material of his matching wool sweater. When he’d first opened the box his own sweater had been wrapped in, Squidward had hated it.

The bright fire engine red background with the three white frolicking reindeer stitched on the front was definitely not his style, but SpongeBob had looked so sweet in his it had nearly given Squidward a toothache when he’d leaned over and impulsively kissed his cheek.

That had been proof enough of a truth he had been stuffing down for so long that he felt a powerful mix of fear and liberation as he made a decision. He cleared his throat loudly until he had the attention of everyone in the room.

“Good evening, everyone, and Merry Christmas. Welcome to this festive, annual shindig where we put aside our differences and all get together to celebrate...I’m not sure what exactly we’re celebrating, but here we are! Here you are, here I am, and right here to my left is _**my**_ reason for the season…”

He’d heard the phrase used in some commercial about engagement rings or something similar. It had seemed shallow and trite in the context, but in the heat of the moment it was the perfect way to describe what SpongeBob meant to him.

Squidward took a deep breath as a few of the partiers gave a round of scattered applause. The applause deepened and was accompanied by whistles and a few catcalls as Squidward abruptly took SpongeBob into his arms, tipped him back, and kissed him, in front of Sandy, Mr. Krabs, Patrick, Plankton, Neptune, and by extension everyone in Bikini Bottom and the entire deep blue sea.

When Squidward finally broke away, gasping for air, SpongeBob’s blush was almost as red as their sweaters. He put SpongeBob down and wiped at the beads of sweat on his forehead. There, he’d done it. There was no taking it back, not that he would even if he could. He smiled haltingly at everyone and tugged at the collar of his sweater. Everyone was being surprisingly supportive.

Patrick clapped longer than the rest.

“Woo-hoo, alright! Way to go, Squidward! Merry Christmas!”

**Author's Note:**

> This is a kind of spinoff/follow up to _The Last Day (?)_ , but can be read standalone. I don't know how long this will be, exactly, but the general idea is to try to flesh the story out a chapter a day for the next 8 days. It's sort of like a Hanukkah present to myself. 😊 Let's see how it goes...
> 
> UPDATE: OK, so I got bored. This seems like a good oneshot/drabble anyway. Those are my best kinds of writing, apparently.


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